apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
