its not stalking. its research.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Randomize
