Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
