Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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