my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
