i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
