I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Randomize
