I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
