both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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