I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
