so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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