You can't special order awesome
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Floor bacon is actually really good
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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