So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
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