Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
