But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
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