trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
