he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
