i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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