so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
she peed on how many people?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize
