nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
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