Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
