let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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