I bet he comes in French.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
