I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
