Do you still have your period?
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize