Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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