I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
