Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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