Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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