Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I can't turn off my feet"
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
