She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
