She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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