nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
