Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize
