How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
