More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
