i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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