butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
