so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize
