ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Dear god my vagina.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
