even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
