North Korea, Best Korea!
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
