The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Randomize
