But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I'm really into asian looking animals
so explain again why im purple
no
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Randomize
