took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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