Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
