Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
as a side note pls kill me
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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