its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Randomize
