That's intense
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
