That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
only you would photoshop your dick
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
tell me about the eggs
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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